Communication Mistake: Guys think most comments women make is mostly them nagging.
Posted on 19. Mar, 2010 by Chris in Archive, Communication
Nagging, it’s something guys say about their significant other at times. Why is that? We asked 1,000 guys, why do guys so often refer to any comments or questions that they feel even slightly critical as nagging?
We’ll cover the top three topics of why guys consider some comments/questions as nagging. First, it’s an issue with insecurity, 32% of guys say women are nagging when what they are talking about makes them feel self-conscious.
“It hurts a guy’s ego when a woman says something critical, so by calling them “nagging,” it’s making them feel the same way we did. It’s just lashing out.” – Age: 20
“No one likes their faults being pointed out. It’s a pride thing. I guess men are more sensitive to that than women.” – Age: 37
Next up is relentlessness, 24% of guys feel that sometimes you just don’t let it go ladies.
“I do not think of them as nagging, but when your wife gets on your case for the littlest things then I guess you can classify that as nagging. After typing that, I just realized I forgot to take out the trash. Shit.” – Age: 25
“Because women don’t just say/ask them once, they keep asking/prodding until they get the answer they want.” – Age 42
And finally, it’s about how you say it. 18% of guys feel it’s your demeanor that makes it nagging. It’s not just what you say, but it’s how you say it and how many times you say it.
“The fact is, women nag a lot. They may think it is only slight criticism, but whether through their tone of voice or the sheer repetition, this becomes actual nagging.” – Age: 21
Remember, it’s all in your tone and how many times you say it ladies. If you don’t want to be considered a nag, let it go after once and don’t sound too critical.
Communication Mistake: Guys don’t like to lose to women
Posted on 18. Mar, 2010 by Chris in Archive, Communication
Let’s say you and your guy are running a race, at the end, you do better than him by ½ mile. Does your guy congratulate you on doing better than him? Or does he kind of pout and sulk that he wasn’t the better one? We asked 1,000 guys, why don’t guys like to lose to women?
Good news ladies, the majority of guys don’t care. 52% of guys say they are not afraid to lose to women.
“I more of enjoy the game without worrying about winning.” – Age: 33
“It would be egotistical of me to always want to win. It would also be pretty boring! And since I don’t want to hang out with men all the time, it just makes sense to not worry about it when a woman beats me at something.” – Age: 45
Now for the guys that actually do care if they win or lose. Some guys (24%) think that losing in front of a woman challenges their manhood.
“We are constantly being judged by women on characteristics such as physical prowess. If you are trying to prove that you have more prowess than the next male, losing in a competition to a woman certainly hurts your cause.” – Age: 30
“Men are the stronger sex, we DON’T lose to women, if we do it’s degrading.” – Age: 42
Some guys are just trying to impress you and they feel winning will do that.
“If I’m single and I’m in front of single women, I want to make the best impression possible in front of them. I don’t want to be the one everyone feels sorry for.” – Age: 28
And there’s the 10% of guys that just don’t like losing. Male or female they won’t be happy to lose, at anything.
“It’s not any different than losing in front of men.” – Age: 27
So, while the majority of men say they don’t always have to be the winner, there’s a good percentage of guys that do care, whether it’s insecurity or just plain macho ego.
Communication Mistake: When guys say nothing is wrong, something’s obviously wrong
Posted on 12. Mar, 2010 by Chris in Archive, Communication
When a guy asks a woman if something is wrong and she wants to talk about it, but wants to be coy about it and get the guy to ask her a couple of times what’s wrong, she says nothing’s wrong. However, just because women do it (don’t deny it ladies…you know you do), does not mean that when a guy says nothing’s wrong it means the same thing. We asked 1,000 guys, why do guys say “nothing’s wrong”?
Guys are simple, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise that 50% say that when they say “nothing’s wrong”, they mean nothing is wrong.
“I am honest and up-front with my feelings/emotions in my relationships and if nothing is wrong then I will say that nothing is wrong. If there is something wrong then I want to address it so I say something is wrong so we can work things out before it affects our relationship worse.” – Age: 20
“Men do not usually say that. Women say it a lot and we know there is something wrong. Most men when there is something wrong they will let you know.” – Age: 46
“Most men are direct. We will challenge others. “Nothing” can also mean that while there still may be an issue, we don’t consider relevant to warrant discussion.” – Age: 41
“Because men are not typically passive-aggressive like women are. If he says nothing is wrong, then likely nothing is wrong. Men don’t talk much, so when we do we’re not lying a lot. Some probably do, but you need to know your man.” – Age: 26
The other 50% say they say nothing’s wrong for a variety of reasons. 24% don’t want you to worry, 16% just don’t want to talk about it, and the list continues.
“Some men are lying when they say this because they don’t want to worry the woman in their lives by whatever is bothering them and they don’t want to show their vulnerable side.” – Age: 24
“I believe sometimes men feel that they don’t want to mention certain problems to women, due to trying to be the provider of the house or appear as a stable person. The “knight in shining armor” scenario” – Age: 22
“Everyone, men and women have things about themselves that always remain private. If they keep away these secrets, some will interpret this as lying.” – Age: 52
Ladies, the next time your guy says “nothing’s wrong” take that at face value. Just because you don’t always mean “nothing” when you say it, don’t assume guys function along the same lines. Don’t project your feelings/actions onto them.
